God Save the Queen!

Big News in the 'Burg!

For a few short days, Williamsburg is privileged to have Queen Elizabeth II as its honored guest to celebrate the 400th anniversary of the landing at Jamestown. It has been 50 years since QEII has visited the 'Burg. My father was telling me during the Queen's 1957 visit his mother dragged him to Chicago to see her. He was 8 years old and remembers nothing but a discussion about the number of shoes she must have!

-

While I don't really care about the number of shoes she has, it was exciting to get to see the Queen up close. The Queen's carriage was followed by a carriage with retired Justice Sandra Day O'Connor. I didn't know that Justice O'Connor was to be in the entourage. Unfortunately, I put my camera away before I spotted her.

-

Here are some of the better pictures from the outing. Her Majesty looks good!

President's Day Party

PRESIDENT'S DAY PARTY!

Thanks to all who came over last night. We had a blast! We hope that everyone else had a great time. I thought it would be fun to put the submissions to the coloring contest up. Enjoy!

-

Teddy Roosevelt

James K. Polk

Thomas Jefferson

John Quincy Adams

William McKinley

Geo. Washington

William Howard Taft

Franklin D. Roosevelt

Richard M. Nixon

James K. Polk

Thomas Jefferson

Franklin Pierce

Zachary Taylor

On request, I can place larger images on here. There were so many, I left them small. Again, thanks to those who participated!

Sober the Sasquatch

Little bit of pop culture heaven: Weeds over on Showtime. This show is smart, funny, and wholly original. I didn't expect it at all.

I haven't watched Weeds since its inception. It's an "add-on" show to my television season (which is getting decidedly more hectic as the end of the semester approaches). With Project Runway sadly gone and Big Love no where in sight, Weeds is a breath of fresh air. And next week is the finale...

Episode 8: MILF Money. That's right, MILF Money. Hilarious. MILF Money introduced us to Sober the Sasquatch. Sober gave us the moral of the episode: "DRUGS ARE WRONG!" Oh, the irony. The entire exchange between Shane and Celia and Sober the Sasquatch is brilliant. Really, not to spoil the show, but it isn't just catchy and side-splitting. The show is...wait for it...thought provoking.

I think that if the Simpsons were not animated and played on cable, it might play somewhat similarly. At one point, this is theater of the absurd (drug dealers, PTA moms, Inuit bounty-hunters). Viewed another way, this is a social commentary (drug dealers, PTA moms, Inuit bounty-hunters). Plus, for your added pleasure, Sober the Sasquatch.

Remember, drugs are wrong. Also remember...whether it be milf weed, booze, television, or studies...you do drugs.

Return to the Blogosphere aka Thanks to You, El Guapo

After a long hiatus, I have decided to return to the Blogoshpere. In another attempt to put off my continued studies, I am returning to 21st Amendment.

Last night before I went to bed, I could not help but think about the on-going argument that I have with my father about television and the movies. My father swears that television and the movies have to be “edifying” to merit attention. I whole heartedly disagree.

Stand with me for a minute. My father thinks that Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World is one of the best movies ever. It is good; I’ll give him that. However, his great idea is that, “it’s edifying.” So, if you can’t learn from it, can’t take away some grand idea or knowledge, it’s shit. I disagree.

Here it is: plethora. PLETHORA. You all know where you learned the word. That’s right, Dad. I learned that word from Three Amigos! The movie only gets 5.8 stars out of 10 on the IMDB. How wrong…

Here is the quote:

Jefe: We have many beautiful pinatas for your birthday celebration, each one filled with little surprises!
El Guapo: How many pinatas?
Jefe: Many pinatas, many!
El Guapo: Jefe, would you say I have a plethora of pinatas?
Jefe: A what?
El Guapo: A *plethora*.
Jefe: Oh yes, El Guapo. You have a plethora.
El Guapo: Jefe, what is a plethora?
Jefe: Why, El Guapo?
El Guapo: Well, you just told me that I had a plethora, and I would just like to know if you know what it means to have a plethora. I would not like to think that someone would tell someone else he has a plethora, and then find out that that person has *no idea* what it means to have a plethora.
Jefe: El Guapo, I know that I, Jefe, do not have your superior intellect and education, but could it be that once again, you are angry at something else, and are looking to take it out on me?

Be honest, people. Isn’t that where we all learned the word? Without Three Amigos! the word would be lost to assholes who took their SATs seriously and read Webster’s for fun. I thank you, El Guapo, for saving the word from oblivion.

"Dixie" Chicks or "Dissing" Chicks

Seeking: Blue state residents to subsidize multi-millionaire pop stars who have alienated fan base after down-home, "we're just like you" charade exposed. Will belittle former fans with complete indiscretion to make a quick buck. Immediatly available for recording sessions in Malibu or other California venue. Contact Natalie, Martie, or Emily.


The way I see it, these Dissing Chicks have a limited future. There're done. They piss me off. Let's go over what we know.

1. March 10, 2003 the Dixie Chicks virtually eliminated their fans with a statement in London. "Just so you know," clueless crooner Natalie Maines told the crowd, "we're ashamed the President of the United States is from Texas."
2. Retribution for the statement was swift. Country music radio stations held CD burning events and banned the group from their playlists. Pinko commies and lefties lashed out at the country music fans who were offended by the group and participated in such events equating them to the Nazi book-burnings of the 1930's-40's. ("It's the people who have gone overboard and done such irrational things that take you back to the days of book burning. That is a concern for me," band member Maguire said.)
3. The Dixie Chicks come out of two months of hiding, appearing on the cover of Entertainment Weekly in May 2003 naked and covered with words/phrases ("free speech" and "boycott" and "Dixie sluts").
4. May 2006, the Dixie Chicks release their new album retracting previous apologies and appearing in a Time magazine cover story "Radical Chicks" in which Maines lets makes the telling statement, "I apologized for disrespecting the office of the President, but I don't fell that way any more. I don't feel he is owned any respect whatsoever."

My problem with the Dissing Chicks isn't Maines's statement about the President (or the fact that it took place outside of the United States) like many of their original fan base. My problem with the Dissing Chicks is that they really don't give a shit about the millions of fans that placed them in the position to make these very public statements.

Consider this, aren't Dixie Chick fans allowed to exercise their free speech right to stop listening to their crappy music? To whom does that First Amendment right really apply? Time and Entertainment Weekly want you to believe that it is the Dixie Chicks who have been maligned.

The bottom line on the Dixie Chicks is that they simply do not represent the same values as the people who listen to country music. For that reason, their music continues to move closer and closer to pop music. They say that they "blur the line" between country and pop. Let's be honest, that's because they have to find a new fan base. I took great note on PINK IS THE NEW BLOG the other day when Trent made it known he was purchasing the new Dixie Chicks album. This is representative of the absolute necessity for that group to reign in new listeners from blue states.

The Chicks, no longer recording in Nashville but in California, are now taking direct shots at their former fans. In "The Long Way Around" Maines sings about her teenage friends who married their high school beaus and live "in the same ZIP codes where their parents live." (Entertainment Weekly follows this quote up with a heartfelt "Take that, CMT viewers!") God forbid, Natalie, that some folks marry their high school sweethearts, grown old in their hometowns, and aren't able to move about at a whim because they ripped off their compatriots earning millions upon millions in the process. I am offended. I knew my wife in high school. If I could get away with it and earn a good living back home, I would be there. Does that make me shit? Does that make me small-minded, ignorant? Here's a big "F**K YOU" to Ms. Maines.

Hey, support the President, don't support the President, I don't give a good goddamn (but you'd better support the troops - failure to do so is an unforgivable sin). Don't cut off the hand that feeds you unless you can get away with it (and if you can, be prepared for your former friends and supporters to give you the middle finger right back at you). I get the funny feeling that the new battle cry will be Remember the Maines.

(New and Improved) Deal or No Deal

I am a huge motor sports fan, but I have not yet blogged about NASCAR or Indy Car or Formula 1. And luckily for you, I'm not really going to do so today.

I was thinking about motor sports while watching Deal or No Deal on NBC tonight. I watch Deal or No Deal for the same reason novice race-goers watch motor races: the awful crashes.

I love it when those bastards on Deal or No Deal start off, apparently normal, and are transformed into disgusting greed mongers. They dance, they sing, they hug Howie Mandel. That's great. Then (my favorite part) they fall...

They keep pushing their luck. "NO DEAL!"

I really love the wives. They become frantic, crying and shit for their husbands to "please, for the love of God, take the damn deal!" And the husband will not take the deal as long as some asshole friend tells him not to (because men fall for that shit every time - oh, the peer pressure!).

It gets so bad, eventually that greedy bastard ends up with $1,750. At the end the wife claps her hands and says something like, "Don't worry, baby. This is all about the ride. I love you anyway." That's a damn lie. Okay, maybe she does love him, but she would have loved him a shitload more if he had taken the deal for $186,000 offered three minutes earlier.

Here's the new and improved Deal or No Deal. I propose the combination of Deal or No Deal with Divorce Court. That way when hubby screws up his formerly-loving wife can march him to the next studio where Judge Mablean can divide the marital estate and yell at the man for being such an ass. I suppose that would be a better project for Fox than NBC.

Sadness at the Preakness

Today was a sad day at the Pimlico, site of the Preakness Stakes. I don't follow the ponies too closely, but I like to watch the Triple Crown races. Today poor Barbaro fractured his leg both above and below the knee ending his Triple Crown dreams and endangering his life. America will have to wait at least one more year (totaling 28) for a Triple Crown winner.

While I am saddened for Barbaro, the sadest thing at the Preakness was unrelated to horse racing altogether. I was terribly saddened by the Maryland state song - "Oh Christmas Tree."

I kid you not. The Maryland state song, which they call "Maryland, My Maryland," is "Oh Christmas Tree."

I suppose it is not too surprising that a state would have such a song as its official theme. It could be worse but not by much. I can think of some other terrible song choices, most notably during the 2000 Democratic National Convention.

There was a song played at the Demo's pow-wow that year that came out the prior year entitled "Mambo No. 5." "Mambo No. 5" detailed a list of women in his life... Beginning the list was the phrase "a little bit of Monica in my life," and then was a list of seven other women. Not a great choice following Monic-gate and a bit off-color for any politico really. I can't help but wonder if they had chosen a better song Florida might have given up 537 more votes to Gore...hmmm.